Obsessive and Uncertain...

October 15, 2008
I'm clearly obsessing over this Peace Corp thing, I mean I started a blog site just to help a friend out..now I'm bloggin almost everyday over this! Which I guess is okay, but I need to calm down. I feel super anxious and the soonest I would leave is August 2009.. Chill.Out.

My recruiter emailed me back, she really enjoyed my update. She basically said all things are out of her hands though. My file is in D.C. so after I complete and turn in my medical stuff, I should update them on things that have happened since I applied (i.e. Spanish lessons taken, any more certifications I have received...) so I look forward to doing that.

I think I get the process more now also, your recruiter nominates you for a certain area and maybe even country (like Belize in my case) but D.C. knows who accepts or who denies their invitation, if the country could asks for more volunteers etc...and THAT is when your assignment could change.

So that buys me time to get some more Spanish lessons since I won't have my medical packet completed before December probably.

I'm kind of nervous about going to the doctor tomorrow. I can't tell you the last time I had blood work...I think I was seriously 6 years old. They can find out all kinds of things with your blood work... so if I let my mind wonder....yeaahhh let me stop. I was a Psych major and when I took Abnormal Psych..every condition in that book I thought I had. I'm one of those! Clearly the Dr. said I was in excellent health so I'm not worried.

I have two more days left on my job and I think that has me the most stressed out. I was on a team of temps basically and we have been on the same assignment for a year and a half. It originally was supposed to be for 6 months and clearly went on past that... so we thought that gig would never end. I know I loathe rolling up to my corporate office, to sit in my corporate CUBE (no human belongs in a cube I tell ya!) hearing corporate banter about year end deadlines and what not...most of all I feel what I'm doing isn't really benefiting anyone. It was fun and cool for awhile (and I love love the people I work with) but I have lost my spirit of hustle! I really am trying to get my non-profit off of the ground and get into life coaching... The possibility of going to the Peace Corp also makes me feel like there is no point in applying for a "real" job.

I kinda wanna be an aerobic instructor or waitress or something and work on my projects. Especially since I kind of have a year deadline...If I can get some clients to coach, pay off my debt, and get the non-profit running with a solid business plan... I would feel great about leaving and August would be the perfect time...

It's an unsure time for me right now. I could just be "safe" and get another corporate gig...but maybe I should hang loose while I can.

Oh and I found out one of my dearest friends just got engaged (Hoorraaayy) I would reaaaaallllly want to be there for that. I didn't want to overwhelm her, but I did put in a plug that I maaaay be leaving Aug '09, soooo plan accordingly :)

So much uncertainty!

That's why I need to be able to sleep in...do yoga in the mornings... and get centered again (the cube is no place to get centered..)...

Hmmmm so much to think about...

Well I will obsessively post tomorrow about my Dr. visit....