From the words of Sam Cooke to the ideals of Obama...Change is what we are talkin about and being about these days (Especially TODAY!! PRAISE GOD!). Change is inevitable, always had been always will be, and boy am I facing a huge change right now. Remember this is the Peace Corps blog so I try to keep it strictly PC :o) So when we last left off in 2008, I was teaching dance and just looking to secure one to two more part time positions. Yeah, well thanks economy for being in recession, I can't get a silly gig anywhere! Since I teach after school, being unavailable from 1-4 really messes things up.
I've gotten to the point where I'm dying waiting to hear back from coffee shops! I mean seriously? This is where we are? After some self reflection and evaluation...I realized, if I'm gonna be working at coffee shops (Which there is nothing wrong with), I can be working at Starbucks...in Missouri, and not paying for rent and really kick of initiative: Pay off Debt to be free to go to Peace Corps.
Now it's not that easy. Going back to Missouri...would really be...going.back. I haven't lived back home since I graduated from college. LA has been my home for the past four...almost five years! It's really hard to wrap my mind around. I also NEVER really thought that I would be almost 30 going to live back home. So I have a lot to chew on.
The math is...made no money in December, don't get paid a dime till the end of January = 2 months absolutely NO.Money. Divided by the deal my landlord gave me discounting my rent and my still struggling = girl you gots to go.
No why not live with my ride or die friends who would do anything for me? Well that's the toss up, but, at this point...what is LA giving me? I can't afford to take my favorite dance classes anymore and all of my time is spend either stressing about or looking for work.
The longer I stay here, the longer I am using my "emergency" credit card... putting myself further into debt instead of getting out! Also take into account that my father is about to disown me over the whole thing...staying here is seeming less and less like the thing to do.
Have I notified the Missouri crew I'm rollin threw? Absolutely not...soooo that's something to do...
Have I told my current employer that I realize I can no longer live on peanuts (even though I would if I could)..Nope!
Have I even really made up my mind completely? Nah, but the numbers don't lie...I'm just in denial
Do I know without a shadow of a doubt I'll get work in MO....not beyond a doubt..but I do have some leads...
I think most of my resistance comes in when thinking of what a big CHANGE it would be. I'm not good with change, especially change of this proportion. Why do you care? Well, this has everything to do with the Peace Corps. There is no way I would consider moving if I wasn't an nominee for August. It's just a gamble because what if I don't get an invite? Then what?
So many things. At the end of the day, I don't think I can go wrong with getting out of debt...doing a Missouri tour...(I can then visit my KC people, Chi-town people, Columbia folks and of course STL peeps)... and then re-evaluating from there.
The only status updates I have gotten was a letter stating I'm dentally cleared and that my medical packet is under review. The sooner I can pay everything off...the sooner I can accept a call with an earlier departure if that comes a-knockin!
These next two months are going to be interesting indeed...
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